Discussion

After I had finished updating the budget/register, DW and I came together so I could show her, for the first time, what our budget looks like and how it all works.  By ‘came together’ I mean I found a rare moment when no kids were around and she was sitting down so I grabbed the laptop and sat in her lap so she couldn’t get up. 

DW was gracious enough about her captivity and listened as I explained our budget and even asked questions. When I was finished she admitted that 90% of what I said made no sense to her so we both agreed that DW really has NO head for numbers.  With that out in the open DW said the most wonderful thing, “Since numbers are not my thing, what can I DO to make our budget successful.”  DANG, I sure picked a good one.

Never one to be unprepared, I had a list of areas I could use her help and we discussed each. 

• Become more attune to what is takes/costs to run a household.
• Ask any competent ‘head or household’ how much toilet paper is in the house and when they expect to have to buy dish soap again and they will probably be able to tell you. In my house, I expect to be in Toilet Paper Crisis level 2 but Friday evening and the dish soap will last about 6-8 weeks as long as DS3 doesn’t attempt to do dishes… or bathe the dog…..or try to make the kitchen floor a slip and slide again….I digress.  I have a constant tally in my head of household necessities and upcoming costs and budget accordingly. But I can’t remember everything.  I need DW to pay attention and let me know when household staples are low, NOT OUT.  I need her to tell me when her oil change is coming up and not let me discover it when I borrow the Big Car and see the oil should have been done 600 miles ago. This would help us stay on budget and not have so many surprise costs.
• Search for the Savings
• I am constantly thinking about and implementing new things to help us save money. It isn’t always successful but I try. I need DW to get on board with this and try to come up with some ideas as well.   
• Don’t just ask, help plan
• This is probably my biggest pet peeve.  Any big purchase or event in our family gets researched, planned and funded by me. It is exhausting and sometimes I just give up on being prepared and we spend willy-nilly.  Currently we either come up with ideas together or she will ask if we could do something and then off she goes secure in knowing I will figure it out. It was decided that since I like the numbers I will find ways to fund these but she needs to help figure out the costs, logistics and come up with ideas to save money. She agreed to help with this and we have several events we need to plan for:
• a family trip to the zoo (May)
• A solo trip DW is taking to visit a friend in California (Airfare, lodging and most activities are paid for by said friend.) (November)
• DS1 summer camp (June/July)
• Family Day (It replaced adoption anniversary celebrations and is a day for all of us to celebrate being a family, even if temporarily)  (October)
• Camping Trip (August)
• Out of State Wedding (August)
• Sister Vacation (Little sister and I try to get out of town once a year together, last trip was to San Fran so this year is going to be a short and cheap staycation.) (Whenever)

So those are all the items we discussed. I am feeling really confident about our success.